Two Worlds

That's right, I'm back. Internet crashes and unreadable disks are paltry challenges! Anywho, this week I'm looking at a bad game. A really bad game. A game so bad that I felt obligated to use the cheat codes. A game so bad that it scales an eleven on the badness scale. I'm talking about Two Worlds. The first thing that I noticed about this game is the primitive level of the graphics, and the godawful voice work. I swear, Steven Hawking voiced half of the characters in this game. As I went on playing it, I found the gameplay to be clunky, shallow, and "Is something wrong with my Xbox or is the framerate really that bad?" I don't believe that I have ever spent so long on one game figuring out how to freaking change the spell that I'm casting. The only thing that's worse in this game is the inventory system, which clumps the tiny item pictures together in incomprehensible clutter, with no thought put into organization at all. I was thouroughly disgusted by the fact that unless you keep your inventory screen spick and span, you find yourself taking five minutes or longer to put on the new armor suit you bought. Which brings me to my next complaint, all of the items in the game to be bought are too expensive to even be comparable to the amount of gold you have on hand at any given time. Quests award miniscule amounts of gold, and ultimately pointless faction reputation boosts. Then there is the writing for the game. Just like the rest of the game, the story is pitiful, shallow, not well constructed, and completely baffling. It doesn't even have a satisfying ending. All the ending is, is this two second cut scene that takes you back to the main menu. The only game I can think of with a worse ending than this is The Lord of The Rings: The Third Age, which didn't even have an ending... >:( Now the combat holds special contempt, at least for me. The enemies are so ridiculously powerful, that it isn't even practical to take them on in close combat, and ranged attacks are laughably weak. So your only option is to run away like a sissy. Then there are the rewards you get. At the endgame point, you can actually take on the enemies without the fear of getting your ass kicked. Pretty decent reward if you ask me. /sarcasm. There really is no other reward. It's all pointless. Just the same douchebag character with the synthesized voice running around being an ass hole, because that's all that he can do, there is no actual role playing in this game. It would more aptly be called a killing time game. What with the company's announcement that they're making a sequel you have to stop and ask yourself, "Why? What point is there in a sequel? Will it be slightly less terrible? Will it have better voice overs? Anyway, I'm not going to hold my breath. Next week, I'm going to be looking at a game, and it's sequel together. (Insert cheesey line here.)